I was about six. Standing in a cold bathroom. Struggling to get my extremely tight-fitted shirt off my head. Tears stung my eyes. Where was my mommy or daddy to help me?
There was a knock at the door. My Kindergarten teacher’s wife was gently offering to help me with whatever it was that was holding me up. I said I was fine. Yet continued to struggle with this dumb shirt.
I was attempting to put on my witch costume for a play to perform for our families. One problem. My family wasn’t there.
I finally exited the bathroom with a disheveled costume and hair. The wife of my teacher whispered in my ear, “don’t worry…I will cheer and clap for you”…how did she know? That is what I cried and longed for….
To do this day, I remember it as if it just happened. ..my forty-something year old eyes reliving that day through those six year old eyes…laying on the floor, peeking from under my black witch’s hat to see if the wife was really cheering and clapping for me.
My heart smiled.
That was over thirty years ago.
There are countless other vivid moments from my childhood and teen years and early adulthood that I can still feel and see…
Not sure why these things stick with me…I am certain other people share these types of memories…but why??
Is it the foundation of who we become as adults? Is it to test our strengths and weaknesses? Is it all planned out by some higher power? Will these memories follow us into the afterlife…no matter what we believe in?
A sad moment with a family member, a serious talk with a friend, a romantic encounter…all little moments in our time threading together to our present. To remind us maybe of who we were and who we are.
Quite possibly a life quilt of sorts…different shapes and sizes and colors. Some dark, some vibrant. Sewn together to blanket us, make us feel safe and warm with who we have become…
I like my quilt…some days I feel like I could use another layer to protect me from the cold hard world I live in…other days, I toss it aside. Jump up and claim this moment as mine…remembering who I am, holding back those dark moments, like my first ever school play, to enjoy the joyous day that lies before me.